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Writer's pictureBruce Caines

Top 12 Lame Excuses For Not Doing A Boudoir Photography Session


Boudoir portrait, white shirt on bed

There are a lot of outside the box things each of us wants to try. Bucket List items like skydiving, learning to juggle, building a Habitat for Humanity home, running a marathon, or holding a shark. (Shark fantasizer...you know who you are.)

Our excuses are typically lame when we don’t follow through on these adventures of accomplishment. “Um…I couldn’t get anyone to cat-sit while I jumped out of that plane.” You know and I know, those excuses are 99% B.S.

So it’s time to deal with your “I can’t do a boudoir photo shoot” excuse. You want to do it, and yeah, the idea makes you a little nervous. But so what? So here are the Top 12 B.S. Excuses For Not Doing a Boudoir Shoot—and the reason YOUR reason is garbage! Why 12 reasons? Because there are more than 10.

Number 12

Excuse #1: I need to lose five (or ten? or twenty? or two??) pounds.

Oh, stop it! If we all waited until we weighed just the right amount, we would never get anything done, right?. You’re not a prize fighter or an astronaut with weight requirements. Okay, maybe you are, but photography doesn’t require a weigh-in. And let’s be honest, even the most spectacular model you’ve ever seen, obsesses about how she looks. But then she gets in front of the camera and WORKS it. Because inside she knows she’s fierce. Just like you--for all the same reasons you even THOUGHT about doing a boudoir shoot. OK? NEXT!!

Excuse #2: I’m not a model. I don’t know how to pose. I’ll look awkward.

Ha! I knew you’d latch on to that model analogy and I’m ready for you! No, you may not be a model and you may not know how to “pose.” But if you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and turned a certain way because you thought it made you look good—and it did, or you stood a certain way to give that cutey a good look while they walked across the room to meet you--you know how to pose. And either way, as your photographer, I am there to help guide and direct you to move and pose in ways that make you look beautiful and like the true you.

Excuse #3: I’m nervous about posing or modeling in front of someone.

Let me share this with you: the comedy of watching me demonstrate how to do “sexy” poses will eliminate any fear or nervousness you may have! You may actually have a hard time keeping your ”sexy face” on for the remainder of the shoot as you stifle your flashback laughter. But seriously, everyone has a bit of nerves, but it quickly dissolves because we have so much to do and so much fun. I will literally demonstrate what I mean if it helps you. And we’re talking through most of the shoot. You will be surprised when you suddenly realize an hour later we are done and you forgot to be nervous.

Excuse #4: I don’t buy or own lingerie. I don’t have anything sexy to wear.

Let’s just imagine this scenario: You have favorite little jacket. Maybe you just own cotton briefs but not lacy panties. How sexy might you look with just your favorite jacket, maybe a bra, those briefs and nothing else? A little makeup. A little hair touch up. Hmm…suddenly, who needs frilly lingerie? Not That girl! A soft, oversized sweater off the shoulder? Deconstructing everyday outfits can be even more suggestive than some pricey Victoria’s Secret find. We’ll chat and we will be creative about your wardrobe options. We also have lots of white sheets for draping and wrapping.

Excuse #5: I’m too old for boudoir.

I have photographed women from 20 to 60+. While you may think young women add a certain appeal to boudoir photography, the most stunning photographs are often of women with life experience. You can see it in their eyes and their gestures. It’s real—not something learned from Instagram. And in my opinion, the women who most appreciate the celebration of their strength and beauty are the older ones. “Oh my goodness! Look at me! I’m beautiful!!

Excuse #6: I don’t have anyone to give the photos to.

Yes you do. YOU. No matter who the photos are for, the experience is for you. The added gift is having the images to remind you of that experience and remember that other part of who you are. The gift is also the experience of being pampered by a hair stylist and makeup artist. Having a photographer focused (no pun intended) just on you as we work together to create your collection of gorgeous images. Being a supermodel for a day. And if later, you end up with someone you want to share the photos with, that’s just awesome too.

Excuse #7: My partner/spouse wouldn’t approve.

First, you should know that our shoot space is your safe space. It is your space to be as kooky, bawdy, daring and sultry as you want. Your shoot is between you and my team. We don’t make any judgments, and we respect your privacy. So, take that information and use it as you will. Just know that you are our client.

Excuse #8: Spending money on myself this way is frivolous.

This is not just buying some cute shoes. You’re making an investment in your self-confidence. You might think that cute shoes are a cheaper way to go, but living the experience and having the images will last much longer than a pair of Christian Louboutins. Whether you just want to capture a moment of time, or celebrate an achievement, in my opinion, the positive self-affirming experience and the impression it makes on your psyche, becomes more holistic than buying pricey shoes that you’ll wear a handful of times.

Excuse #9: I don’t know how to be sexy.

The best and most fulfilling shoots are with women who don’t feel they can “do sexy” in front of the camera. Often the sexy comes out in the playing around to get there. Helping you channel your hidden temptress, seeing you get it and revel in it, is amazing.

Excuse #10: What if my partner doesn’t like my pictures?

That’s just crazy talk! We will be working together to make you look amazing. What’s that thing your partner likes about the small of your back or the shape of your calf? Yup, secret weapons in our toolbox to increase the likelihood of hearing, “Wow, sweetheart! You look gorgeous!” Besides, your significant other already thinks you’re hot. This is just a reminder.

Excuse #11: I can’t afford a boudoir photo shoot.

I completely understand that finances affect all of our lives, and which nonessential treats we allow ourselves. Just like saving up for a special girls’ night out or a long weekend away, a boudoir photo shoot is a little self-love experience you can also put money aside for. And while you may not be able to drop several hundred dollars at this very moment, we can help make your dream photo shoot come true by setting up a payment plan for you.

Excuse #12: Everyone will see my pictures.

No! Everyone will not see your pictures. The photos you have seen on our website or our social media, we have been given permission by our clients to share their gorgeous images. We only share photographs of women who allow us to display their images so that other women can see the potential beauty that lies within them. Every client signs a release that either grants or denies us rights to showcase your beautiful portraits.

Ok—so we're clear now, right? Your excuses are easily overcome. And even if your particular reason was not on this list, you see how positive thinking and a few deep breaths makes the idea of doing a boudoir shoot so much less daunting. You deserve to reward yourself. So before you freak yourself out again, contact me so I can help you move toward having a wonderful luxury experience and self-esteem love fest!

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